So far away.

Days have become a surreal blur. Audrianna would have been 2 months old on Christmas day and I miss her terribly. Our family is struggling to move on and live a normal life. I know we can't move on with life in a few months, but it's almost as though time is working against us. Tuesday would have been my due date with her. She would have just been born. It has definitely been rough trying to deal with this, especially during the Holidays.

I am Audrianna's mother

I have been thinking too much lately. Audrianna has been on my mind nonstop. It has been 6 weeks since our brief hello and goodbye in October. I have finally gone back to work and I also got her memorial tattoo done. To state, I may have only got to carry her for 30 weeks, but in those 30 weeks I got to hear her beartbeat, watch and feel her move, see her beautiful face on ultrasounds, and I got to hold her in my arms for hours, yes, even after she had passed. She will be in my heart for a life time and beyond. I love my daughter so much that it hurts. Time heals all wounds, I just don't know how long it will take for this one to heal. 8:12a - 8:51a 10/25/12

A bit late

The first month has passed, it has not gotten any easier, not that I'm expecting it to be easier, but the past month has been the hardest one in my entire existence. Aaron and I have increasingly gotten closer and have made the love we share not only for our daughter, but one another, nearly unbreakable. I am so grateful that he is the man that is walking this journey with me. If it were not for him I don't know if I would be able to sit here and tell everyone this. We share the same tears, him and I. I can honestly say, I love him and I don't feel guilty about it. Love is the key.

"I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love." -Mother Teresa